Day 32: If it was possible for you to switch from human to animal form at will, which animal would you choose?

You've often known my desire to morph into an animal at will. Some people wish they could morph into a crab, so they can pinch their enemies to death. Some people wish to be able to morph into a llama, so they can eat the ham. I, on the other hand, have higher thoughts.

I quickly thought about how much I'd love to be a monkey and eat bananas as long as I still wasn't allergic to them. Then, I could do things like climb trees and throw poop at people who walk by. But then, I thought, "Man, oh man! I'd love to be a tiger. Raw power. Stripes! Who knew!?" I could hunt like a wild man.

However, after all that thinking, I ate some burnt Fruity Dyno-Bites and wanted to throw up. Then, I realized, "If I was any of those two creatures, I'd be hunted down, trapped, or put in a zoo." And that's why I did not choose them.

I love having dreams about flying, and I thought, "I should be an animal that flies!" There are a few mammals that try to fly, but I had to end up deciding on a bird. Now, you might think, "I bet he'll choose the Bald Eagle cuz he's the American, bird...or maybe a hawk, since he is Adam the Hawk." If you think that, you're wrong. I chose:

Philippine Eagle

The Philippine Eagle is one of the most rare raptors in creation. It's also large and in charge and has a wicked awesome hair cut when it's all up in your business. And might I add, check out this wingspan:

It's from a far away place, so it doesn't look that big. I'll try it again.

No you know.

When someone would try to come up and catch me or put me in a trap or even throw me in the zoo, I'd fly away. I'd also sit on top of trees and look down at people like they don't even know.

I also had a dream that I got the job at Par-A-Dice, so let's keep praying my interview at 5pm goes spectacular. I've had a lot of dreams about upcoming events...It's freaking people out. Some people die a little.

What should I blog tomorrow?

Day 29: 3 wishes

What does "3" wish? I wish 3 would hurry up and wish, already. Yes, I did think that was funny. I laughed for a bit. Not too much, though. It's simply that this day doesn't really say anything such as, "If you could have three wishes, what would they be?" No, just 3 WISHES!!!

If I could have three wishes from a genie in a bottle, I'd probably be called a witch and be burned at the stake. What really happened in life was: I loved Genie in a Bottle, and I was called a queen. Not quite the same thing.

3 Wishes:

1. I wish I could fly (without help from a machine or another other substance). I love having dreams where I am flying around town or the supermarket. My short friends could turn to me for help when they need something off the top shelf at IKEA. I would need to invest in googles and helmets and such, so I don't get bug-ridden from travel. 
2. I wish I could go back and live life over with the knowledge and wisdom I now have. Wouldn't that be great? I'd probably still make stupid mistakes, but I'd be a whole lot better at understanding people around me. True, I am who I am today because of the choices I made, but this is my blog and my wish. I can wish what I want, jerk.
3. I wish I could communicate with God just like how I communicate with people on this earth. It would be great to be able to see God's facial expressions, hear his intonation, and clearly hear what he is saying to me. Would that falter my faith? I don't think so, but who am I to judge?

If I could ask for more wishes, I'd probably also wish that my bowels would not be so irritable and uncontrollable. I'd wish that I was able to flee from temptation without pause. I'd wish that I could sing like a male version of Christina Aguilera. 

If you ever come across a genie who has been stuck in a bottle for centuries, I think he might slap you first. Then he'd probably realize what he had done and ask for forgiveness. He, or SHE...oooo...think about it...

Day 10: Something you’re afraid of

While Hope Floats is celebrating being in two consecutive posts of mine, she will not make it a third in a row...dang...never mind. She just outsmarted me for the third. However, she is the not the subject of "Something you're afraid of" because I could take her in a bar fight. Not in a wrestling match, though. Obviously, she would have her manager "Fabulous" Pamela distract the referee and me with her "fabulous" dance moves, and Angie would hit me with the brass knuckles. I'd be down and out for the ol' 1-2-3.

What am I afraid of? You may be thinking to yourself, "Adam the American, bird ain't afraid of nothing," but that is not true. While I am freakin' Slytherin, due to my ambitious nature and desire to be famous, I have long had a slight fear of snakes. To drum this back up in my memory, I have had two, count them, TWO nightmares of snakes.

1. I was in my parents' house again, as a teenager. There was a wicker ottoman in my bedroom. What was inside this wicker ottoman? A rattlesnake. I tried to have the ottoman chest stuck shut, by jamming it against the doorway, but the freaking snake got out. It followed me down the stairs, and I had to go outside to get away. It then went back in the house. I hoped I could lure it outside the home away from the family. That dirty snake tricked me!
2. I was in my room in my parents' house, again. My dog Buoy was there with me. I don't know how, but a snake got onto my bed. Buoy was trying to protect me from it. There was all sorts of tussle with the comforter, trying to get the snake trapped in it. I think the snake bit Buoy. I freaked out because I thought Buoy had blood all over him, but we had spilt Kool-Aid on him in the tussle. 

As I was expressing my distaste for snakes with Carrie, I reminded myself of my horrible snake experiences as a child. My best friend at the time, Jennifer (Farrington) Eisenmann, and I were walking around the neighborhood, delivering flowers for May Day. As we turned down Railroad Avenue, we were having careless chatter about this or that, and all of a sudden, we felt something hit our shoulders! We jumped and screamed a bit, turning around to find a snake on the ground with holes in it! We ran away quite fast. My father told me it was probably trying to get in a bird's nest, and the bird pecked the crap out of it. 

Weeks later, if not months, I was riding my bike to Pells Park. Guess what! A freaking snake fell from a tree and hit my bike. It, too, had holes in it from a fight with a bird. And that's how I tie my whole blog together. From fighting Angie to a snake getting destroyed by a bird.